i binge-read the summer i turned pretty and am now a sleep-deprived mess. SEND HELP?? || so i may have stumbled upon my MOST HATED BOOK OF ALL TIME THAT SHALL BE THE REASON BEHIND MY EVILLY SAD DESTRUCTION

possibly, one of the worst things in life is when you read an entire book and then realize that you are passionately of the mind that what you just read MUST BE BURNED DOWN, even if aforementioned burning TAKES DOWN THE WORLD WITH IT.

it’s even sadder if you accidentally happen to read an entire SERIES that matches the description.

hi i’m the olive (REMEMBER ME?? i rule upon the worlds??) and i spent 2 sleepless days wasting my time trying not to throw books and torn hair at the wall.

mostly because it wasn’t the wall’s fault, ok?? BUT ALSO BECAUSE AFOREMENTIONED BOOKS WERE ON MY IPAD AND THE IPAD IS MY LIFE SO THIS IS TECHNICALLY SELF-DESTRUCTION AND WHY WOULD I DO THAT.

hence also the disappearance, although that can be blamed on many other less fortunate things such as:

  • ME NOT WANTING TO WRITE
  • i am firmly of the opinion that DISAPPEARING IS FUN SOMETIMES
  • also was busy as mentioned already
  • and travelled to india WHICH IS SLIGHTLY EXHAUSTING
  • i wanted to just generally avoid all things. which includes the blog

but look.

you know how they always show these grumpy middle-aged people in movies, standing on their uncleaned front porch the entire day and yelling at neighbourhood kids for throwing balls into their yards and painting on the wall and pulling all the grass out??

i’ve recently learned that life can do that to you sometimes.

actually. this book might do that to you someday.

IF I AM GRUMPY FOR THE REST OF THE YEAR AND AM OCCASSIONALLY FOUND TALKING SMOL KIDS’ EARS OFF REGARDING THE RIGHT DIRECTION OF THOWING BALLS (WHICH DOES NOT INCLUDE MY FRONT YARD DARN YOU, ALTHOUGH I TECHNICALLY DO NOT HAVE ONE BUT THERE ARE SOME THINGS WE MUST #CONVENIENTLY #IGNORE BEFORE I TEAR YOUR HAIR OUT), KNOW THAT ‘THE SUMMER I TURNED PRETTY’ IS TO BLAME.

it’s actually kind of monstrous.

and it might also be the reason for destruction of the dragons and the evil queen of ALL (aka ME).

reasons why ‘the summer i turned pretty’ might turn you into grumpiness galore AND MAKE ALL THE KIDS HATE YOU AND ALSO MAKE THE DRAGONS DISAPPEAR

(also, before we go in, FAIR WARNING but there’s a couple of minor spoilers sprinkled throughout the review because i’m mad and it’s a rant. you cannot have a rant without minor spoilers. except i suggest YOU NEVER GO ANYWHERE NEAR THE BOOK SERIES so getting to know all the spoilers MIGHT KEEP YOU AWAY. but yes, there’s spoilers SO AT LEAST I WARNED YOU)

this book kind of proves that synopses are EVIL CREATURES OF THIS WORLD and often turn out to be liars full of contained evilness AND BETRAYAL

and this is bad because I KIND OF LIVE OFF OF SYNOPSES SOMETIMES OK?? it’s my coping mechanism with homework and ALL THINGS LIFE and the sad sad truth that it isn’t humanly possible to read all the books ever written and it’s also the #1 way to cry over how desperately you want to read a book BUT TIME IS EVIL AND WON’T STOP AT YOUR COMMAND.

i’ve lost faith in the synopsesly beings though. this book lied and so did the synopsis and i’m freakishly mad about that actually. because the synopsis mentioned summer AND HOW THAT’S THE ONLY IMPORTANT THING IN LIFE and i felt so SEEN AND UNDERSTOOD AND I SILENTLY SOBBED??

look maybe the last part is a smol exaggeration BECAUSE ITS NOT THAT EASY TO MAKE YOUR EYES WATER OK but it was still betrayal. which is the point.

this was supposed to be THE book that basically showed solidarity in THE MAGNIFICENCE OF SUMMER and maybe it was also supposed to argue about why SUMMER SHOULD BE OUR EVERYDAY and the rest of the seasons should just conveniently be cut out from life, BECAUSE OBVIOUSLY SUMMER IS THE BEST THING OF EVER BECAUSE WHAT DO YOU CALL:

  • vacations
  • WHICH ALSO MEANS NO SCHOOLS, just to clear any lingering confusion
  • AND THAT TRANSLATES TO FREEDOM, SMOL DUMB OLIVE OF MINE
  • aka THE BASIC NECESSITY OF LIFE, which all adults usually decide to conveniently IGNORE
  • because freedom means conquering the world and life AND ALL THE LIBRARIES OF EVER
  • also holidays are just nice ok
  • AND ALSO ICE CREAM
  • SO. MUCH. ICE CREAM!!!

it sadly didn’t do any of that and starting off my summer with a series that lied about all things summer PROBABLY WASN’T THE BEST IDEA IN HINDSIGHT.

but hindsight is called hind for a reason, AND I LACK FORESIGHT WHICH IS A CONSTANT SOURCE OF ANNOYANCE, but?? THE UNIVERSE DOESNT LISTEN OK??

this was basically a pointless story about a girl named belly who likes sugar and whose only purpose in life is to make a boy fall in love with her. the only summer part of this is the fact that she meets this boy in the summer and never else. i’m possibly making this sound worse than it is BUT IT IS BAD SO I’M ONLY SAVING YOU FROM THE TORTURE THAT SHALL LATER BE YOUR FATE.

THANK ME.

and look, BEING OBSESSED WITH SUGAR IS HIGHLY RELATABLE except the part where BELLY HAS NO PERSONALITY WHICH GETS ANNOYING AFTER A WHILE, and the book has no plot AND HONESTLY NOTHING GOOD GOING FOR IT.

i am anger and annoyance.

the book is misnamed because the only thing that belly is, is a personality-less olive and the whiniest person on the planet in all of ever AND WE MUST DECLARE WAR (and possibly also lead protests to change the title someday because #satisfaction)

plus there isn’t even any ice cream. SO YOU ALREADY KNOW THIS BOOK IS HEADING IN THE WRONG DIRECTION BECAUSE WHAT IS SUMMER FOR IF NOT DEVOURING ALL THE ICE CREAM AM I RIGHT??

i am right.

belly is the queen of dumbness and MAKING-THE-OBVIOUS-WRONG-DECISIONS-BECAUSE-SHE-EITHER-THINKS-ITS-FUN-TO-MESS-LIFE-UP-OR-AFOREMENTIONED-TERRIBLE-CHOICES-ARE-MAYBE-BASED-OFF-OF-SHEER-DUMBNESS-THAT-MAKES-UP-HER-ENTIRE-LIFE.

look i obviously wish it’s the second one because belly is my new-found mortal enemy and i hate her and wish the worst on her. SO ITS UNDERSTANDABLE HOW I WOULDN’T WANT TO THINK SHE HAS A DEEPER CHARACTER THAN THAT AND IS SOMEHOW BETTER THAN THE UNIVERSE AND PLAYING TRICKS WITH LIFE, YES??

yes.

and as the book shows it, I AM RIGHT IN ASSUMING THAT.

she’s kind of annoyingly disrespctful TO LIFE and the generalness of the world, and also has no self confidence CAN SOMEONE PLEASE TELL ME IF ITS EVEN HEALTHY TO ROOT FOR OR LOVE A PROTAGONIST WHOSE ONLY PURPOSE IN LIFE IS TO MAKE A BOY FALL FOR HER AND LIVES FOR NOTHING MORE THAN THAT??

its stupidity and i hate the world for it. THIS BOOK IS JUST BAD, OK??

there’s a love triangle AND I’M NOT AGAINST THEM AS A GENERAL RULE (i like the drama sometimes ok) BUT IT’S INFINITELY TOO MUCH OVER HERE (the drama, i mean)

if we’re ever successful in conducting that aforementioned march to change the name of the world and this jumbly mess of words and ink and wasted tree bark, WE SHALL CHANGE IT TO ‘THE DRAMA-FILLED PAGES OF IDIOCY’ or maybe ‘THERE’S DRAMA HERE AND THERE’S A WARNING THAT PERHAPS YOUR BRAIN SHALL COMBUST SO YOU SHOULD CONSIDER STAYING AWAY’.

it would have been helpful in saving my life like that, if those names were interchanged BEFORE i was subjected to this word-filled mess of aforementioned idiocy. but i also probably wouldn’t be able to stay away from promises of ‘brain combustion’ SO ITS NOT AS COMPLETELY FOOL-PROOF AS WE IMAGINE IT TO BE (#EVILNESS)

but at least THE TITLE WOULDN’T BE A LIE ANYMORE AND IT WOULD ALSO BE SLIGHTLY HILARIOUS AND RIDICULOUSLY ENTERTAINING.

but anyway. love triangle.

it’s technically more like a quadrilateral or something in the first book WHICH STILL MAINTAINS THE FACT THAT IT’S DUMB AND DRAMA FILLED WITHOUT NEEDING TO BE, but its a new-found dream of mine to someday punch all the characters and SCREAM a bit. highly recommend thinking up all the stuff you shall say in the screams when you’re in a bad mood AND ANGRY AT THE WORLD.

conrad is the fischer boy the first. your first impression of him would be, well, acceptable?? or maybe even a smol bit good? he appears strange and slightly mysterious and a little evil AND ALSO SECRET. kind of like, forbidden?? so you might like him and think him decent.

but you shall think wrong. HE’S ACTUALLY VERY BORING AND ORDINARY AND IS SHOWN OVERLY-DRAMATICALLY IN THE FIRST BOOK BUT THEN THE DRAMATIC APPEARANCE LEADS UP TO NOTHING AND HE’S JUST DUMB LIKE THE REST OF THEM AND A GENERAL IDIOT IN SEVERE NEED OF PUNCHING.

we must break a few teeth too FOR SATISFACTION PURPOSES. also HIS NARRATION IS THE MOST TERRIBLE THING OF EVER and the kid DOES NOT KNOW HOW TO BE INTERESTING. like, duuuuude?? it’s hugely boring and also annoying after a while. LET’S PUNCH.

jeremiah is the fischer boy the second and IN LOVE WITH BELLY and jealous that belly chooses conrad over him and MAN. he has terrible taste anyway AND HE’S ALSO ANNOYING BECAUSE. BELLY, OK?? BELLY IS A PERSONALITYLESS IDIOT AND JEREMIAH. HAS. TERRIBLE. TASTE.
he’s also idiot #1 because LET’S BE REAL, this book is kind of famous like that.

to top off the quadrilateral WITH BELLY AT THE TOPMOST POINT, there’s also this one human whose name i forget sometimes. belly meets him at a campfire party (OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT) and falls in love with him but not really. the story goes something like this: belly uses him to make conrad jealous and it kind of works and it’s honestly disgusting.

and then there’s THE STORY. aka ridiculousness GALORE. it’s slightly PHENOMENALLY MINDBLOWING how someone can base 871 entire pages (I CALCULATED) on belly being a general self-obsessed brat, who’s unable to choose between TWO EQUALLY DUMB, PERSONALITY-LESS BROTHERS.

honestly, I THINK THE CHOICE IS PRETTY CLEAR. belly must abandon them ALL (after punching BECAUSE THEY DESERVE PUNCHING OK) and go fly to new york AND START A NEW LIFE WITH ALL THE AMAZINGNESS AND WAFFLES FOR BREAKFAST EVERYDAY AND A PART-TIME JOB WORKING AS A LIBRARIAN WHILE SHE SPENDS THE REST OF HER DAYS CREATING PLANS OF WORLD DOMINATION AND STUDYING LITERATURE AT A UNIVERSITY AND THEN ULTIMATELY TAKING OVER THE WORLD. and changing her name to something that isn’t downright ridiculous.

but belly’s dumb so the book isn’t like that, with belly the greatest narrator of ALL. it goes like this: “oh oh i looove conrad he’s so secretive and brooding AND THE BEST EVER and i love him and want him to just look at me and like me,, oh but wait, there’s also his smol brother jeremiah and he’s the sweetest ever AND ALSO MY FIRST EVER KISS and he loves me maybe i should choose him instead. BUT CONRAD. i love conrad too ok?? but its fine conrad doesn’t want me, so it’s jeremiah. jeremiah is the love of my life and i shall marry him when i’m eighteen and still haven’t finished college because IT’S COOL LIKE THAT and also because he cheated on me during the time when we broke up AND YES THAT’S STILL CALLED CHEATING WHY DO YOU ASK, so i must marry him TO PROVE A POINT. but oh shit i just realized i am actually IN LOVE WITH CONRAD. but its my wedding day WHAT DO I DO. ok let’s fastforward time and BETRAY JEREMIAH and call off the marriage AND WASTE EVERYONE’S MONEY now i shall marry conrad instead my life is so perfect, WOW.”

i do not understand this?

it’s kind of my greatest life ambition to someday murder belly and it’s even worth the imprisonment charges. SHE DESREVES SO MUCH EVILNESS AND ALL THE PUNCHING

there was a time about two years ago when i had the most amazing imagined scenarios of punching all the people who annoyed me. this usually included characters from hindi soap operas and annoying people from life. it was a lot of fun obviously but then i decided to spend my time thinking of more important things (SUCH AS KIDNAPPING THE DRAGONLY BEINGS) and gave up on this smol, evil fantasy of mine.

belly very dangerously stands on the wrong side of the line. also known as β€” THE EVIL SIDE. wherein i decide to start dreaming of the many ways i can torture characters again. except it won’t be soap operas anymore because i’ve long since given up on them. this time it shall be belly instead.

i shall not even feel guilty. because judging by the way her relationships with EVERYONE OF EVER are the weakest ever and don’t even seem geniuinely real, NO ONE WOULD EVEN MIND RIGHT?? RIGHT??

i could possibly also get off the murder charges if i go about this properly.

finishing this ACTUALLY MADE MY WHOLE LIFE and i was happiness and cried tears of SO MUCH JOY

i know it’s dumb how i read through the entirety of three whole books even though I PASSIONATELY HATED THEM ALL WHY WOULD I DO THAT?? idk really. i do dumb stuff sometimes?? or maybe it was the fact that i FLEW THROUGH ALL THE BOOKS and was feeling immensely accomlished regarding my goodreads goal like that. and also wanted to rant WHILE BEING COMPLETELY ACCOMPLISHED FOR IT. so yes. this review was the purpose. fun stuff.

but seriously. FINISHING THIS AND TURNING THE LAST PAGE AND FINDING NO MORE WORDS WAS QUITE HEAVENLY. i laughed for five whole minutes and was smiling lunatically and people probably thought i went mad. which i did. THIS SERIES IS MADNESS SO OBVIOUSLY I INHERITED SOME OF IT.

but look, I WAS VERY VERY HAPPY OK?? this was torturous and feeding-your-worst-enemy-worthy. the thought of never having to read this series ever again for as long as my existence on this planet lasts (PETITION TO NEVER GIVE THIS BOOK ENTRY ONTO MARS) BASICALLY GAVE ME LIFE AND I CRIED. so it isn’t completely bad, i guess?? BECAUSE IT GAVE ME LIFE LIKE THAT.

but also this book kind of made me lose faith IN ALL CONTEMPORARY so i have been busy living off of fantasy and all things taylor jenkins reid ever since. IT’S A NICE LIFE.

thoughts on individual books BECAUSE SCREAMING IS NICE LIKE THAT

the summer i turned pretty (book the first and the comparatively decent)

in an inkshell: there’s a girl and she lives for summer. because summer means she gets to go to the beach house where susannah and her boys live, where belly spent her every summer since as long back as her memory goes, together with conrad and jeremiah, aforementioned boys and belly’s brother-figures and crushes and friends and basically all things of ever. they’re kind of her life and so summer is too.

  • it would have been funny how these books keep getting worse and worse if the first wouldn’t already have been unbearable. I DO NOT EXAGGERATE WHEN I SAY IT WAS TORTURE OK?? the characters are all ridiculously annoying assholes AND THE FACT THAT THEY’RE ALSO LACKING IN TERMS OF ‘KIDNAPPING A PERSONALITY, FOR GOODNESS’ SAKE’ DOES NOT HELP MATTERS.
  • the first installment of ‘THE WHINY BELLY’ tells the story of the summer she finally succeeded in making both the fisher brothers fall in love with her and also the story of belly being a general asshole who uses people and throws them away and is obnoxious and self-obsessed and, you know, THE OTHER GENERAL THINGS YOU’VE LEARNED TO ASSOCIATE HER WITH BY THIS POINT??
  • susannah is the only good point OTHER THAN LAUREN WHO BASICALLY ONE HANDEDLY CARRIES THIS BOOK AND THE ENTIRE WORLD AND MUST BE APPALUDED FOR THE REST OF LIFE. welcome sense, WHICH IS LAUREN. she’s belly’s mum by the way and i firmly believe she has been wronged by the universe AND DESPERATELY DESERVES BETTER CHILDREN JUST SAYING.
  • there’s also smol amounts of swimming and summer parties and the occassional flash backs AND FOOD and truckloads of drama BECAUSE WHAT ELSE IS THE PURPOSE OF LIFE RIGHT

it’s not summer without you (book the second and the worst ever)

in an inkshell: susanah’s dead and it’s kind of sad because she was the only minutely-decent character. except there’s also laurel AND SHE ACTUALLY HAS BRAINS (highly surprising, BUT IN A GOOD WAY) but has HARDLY ANY SHOWTIME. it’s sad. so there’s kind of this adventure to find the missing conrad (belly hates him now) and it’s all expectedly idiotic.

  • look. if we were to try distinguishing and THUS RANKING EVERYTHING IN THE THREE BOOKS, it would be difficulty GALORE to determine the worst possible element. but since i’ve spent days OBSESSING, i’ve come to the very foolproof conclusion that NOTHING beats the book titles in position for worst. THEY’RE OFFICIALLY TORTUROUSLY UNBEARABLE. and also make no sense.
  • also the lack of icecream and SUMMERY THINGS, but THE TITLES ARE ABOMINATIONS OK
  • everything else kind of remains the same though?? except conrad gets worse AND I CANNOT STAND HIM and jeremiah’s pathetic and i sometimes dream sweet dreams of punching sense into him and belly’s the same old self-absorbed brat who cares not about THE WORLD. everything is so EXPECTEDLY UNEXCITING I SHALL CRY
  • there’s also some food though and it feels slightly insulting because FOOD IS GOOD OK?? it does not belong here
  • and there’s also some flashbacks and i hate them because there’s TOO. MUCH. CONRAD in them. there’s also some smol hints at the taylor and belly friendship and its annoying how TAYLOR SEEMS LIKE THE BETTER FRIEND HERE, because again, BELLY CARES NOT. belly’s annoying
  • on second thoughts I KIND OF GET WHY BELLY’S THE TERRIBLE OLIVE SHE ALWAYS PROVES TO BE. its because of the name people!! why wouldn’t anyone want to DESTROY THE UNIVERSE and all the people who named you IF THEY NAMED YOU LAUGHABLY UNSTANDABLE STUFF LIKE, UM, BELLY. her name’s actually isabel BUT IT MIGHT AS WELL BE BELLY. because everyone calls her belly. SOMETHING’S WRONG WITH…. EVERYONE?
  • #YES

we’ll always have summer (book the third and greatest abomination of all)

in an inkshell: there’s a marriage and there’s some unproven stuff and mixed up letters and angry parents and generally-dumb characters. also conrad narrates which ends disastrously because i do end up throwing stuff at the wall. I EXPECT PAYBACK OK?? THIS IS EVILNESS

  • the purpose of this entire series constantly confuses me. the hype does too actually. WHY WOULD PEOPLE FALL IN LOVE WITH CHARACTERS WHOSE ONLY PERSONALITY TRAIT IS TO BLAME THE WORLD EVERY CHANCE THEY GET?? people confuse me sometimes.
  • BUT! i like how the books have a general never-giving-up property of getting worse with every book and every page and every word. HATING WORDS IS A FABULOUS LIFE-COPING MECHANISM ACTUALLY.
  • they’re stubborn like that
  • so by aforementioned property, this book if by far the worst. THE PROPERTY IS PROVEN TRUE BECAUSE IT IS ACTUALLY WAY WORSE THAN ALL THE REST (wow mindblowing)! there’s a marriage and then it’s cancelled and stuff happens and jeremiah is dumped, except belly doesn’t go on to adopt a different name and shift to new york AND THUS BEGIN HER PLAN OF WORLD CONQUERING. she marries conrad.
  • HA. HAHAHAHAHAHA
  • IT WOULD HAVE BEEN RIDICULOUSLY FUNNY ACTUALLY
  • if it hadn’t been annoyingly RIDICULOUS.
  • but it was the later. so it couldn’t be the first
  • also we desperately need to take a smol moment TO APPRECIATE THE BOOK TITLES. i do not undertand them and am confusion. what do you mean by ‘we’ll always have summer‘?? SEASONS AREN’T IN THE GENERAL HABIT OF ABANDONING THE WORLD AND RUNNING AWAY INTO THE GREAT UNKNOWN LAST TIME I CHECKED.

tell me about LIFE?? and how is the world treating you?? IS IT SUMMER AND IF YES HAVE YOU MURDERED ALL THE TBRS YET?? books you’ve fallen in love with recently?? FAVORITE ICE CREAM FLAVOURS?? do you like swimming?? WORST BOOK YOU’VE READ SO FAR THIS YEAR??? also have you read THE ABOMINATION KNOWN AS THIS SERIES?? IF YES, THOUGHTS PLEASE?

29 thoughts on “i binge-read the summer i turned pretty and am now a sleep-deprived mess. SEND HELP?? || so i may have stumbled upon my MOST HATED BOOK OF ALL TIME THAT SHALL BE THE REASON BEHIND MY EVILLY SAD DESTRUCTION

  1. AGEEEEE YOU’RE ALIVE I’M SO HAPPY I WAS BEGINNING TO THINK YOU WOULDN’T BE BACK AND THEN I WOULD JUST DIE FOR LACK OF OLIVISH RAMBLINGS BECAUSE WHERE ELSE COULD I FIND THEM BUT YOU’RE ALIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    But anywho, this post was just wonderful. I’m sorry you had to go through all that pain, but like it made for the best review of EVER and so. That. And ohkie, thanks for convincing me to never ever read this series… I shall stay away so that I can keep my remaining brain cells.

  2. Oh gosh, I have fortunately never come across a bad book (that bad) before (because if it’s that bad, I tend to DNF it via a long sllloooooooowww drag where I swear I’ll read it tomorrow, then tomorrow, then another week or months go by and I finally let it die and remove it from my current reads!!)
    Sorry you went through this but agreed! I hate HATE whiney characters with a passion! Personally, love triangles will be the eventual death of me. They’re my least favorite trope of all time!!
    Great review!

  3. OK SO YES THE BOOKS WERE EXTREMELY HORRIBLE AND I DIDN’Y LIKE THEM EVEN ONE BIT BUT I HAVE TO SAY THE TV SHOW ISN’T AS BAD AND IT MAY MAKE YOU WANT TO THROW THINGS A LITTLE LESS 😭😭 belly’s still kinda irritating though and conrad’s just an ick sljfns

  4. This book dragged on and on and on with no clear ending in sight.
    Ur right thooo.
    Belly WAS a self obsessed brat (with a silly nickname too), who’s only ambition was to make a boy fall in love with her.
    honestly a waste of a time to read this.

    Girls like this irl get on my nerves, and tbh Jenny Han isn’t an authors who’s books I can get into, they just go on for ages, and the girls are just really shallow-

  5. HAHAHA, so this was definitely the entertainment that I didn’t know I needed. I’m so glad that I listened to my gut and didn’t pick up these books even though those covers are so pretty and the titles are kinda cute. But wow, I would’ve probably happily joined you in the murder belly scheme cos she sounds irritating. Plus, love triangles are so not my jam and I probably would’ve ended up needing to chuck to book into the ocean out of pure frustration and what a sad waste of money that would be! Great reviews and reasons to definitely *not* read these books πŸ˜‚ Also, thanks for the entertainment! LOL

  6. I haven’t read this series, so I can’t comment on that. But, I also have to say that I tend to DNF books I’m not enjoying. I only stick it out if I’m expecting them to get better as the book progresses (or the series). I’m curious why you stuck with it.

  7. thankfully, i’ve never read a book that sounds THIS BAD
    I WOULD MUCH RATHER SPEND MY SUMMER FINISHING MY TBR (and adding more books to it) AND HAVING ICE-CREAM, RATHER THAN MAKING A DUMB IDIOT FALL IN LOVE WITH ME
    which brings me to your questions at the end
    my favourite flavours are butterscotch and chocolate (NOT TOGETHER THOUGH)
    ALSO I READ THE HUNGER GAMES AND OH MY GODS I AM SO IN LOVE
    i do like swimming but i am very horrible at it

  8. ONE OF THE MOST BEST RANTS EVER. when things disappoint you punching the *fictional* character is the best option. I had tried a book of Jenney Han but the drama and melodrama and cheesiness killed me from the inside. She kind Of made me hate romance and dramas all together which resulted in me running towards Percy Jackson and more. Plus most books I read is because of its relatability factor (Yes I relate to fictional characters too) but Belly all together had me put in a different universe. WHO SPENDS SUMMER MAKING SOMEONE FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU ? Id rather go to a pool, have ice-cream AND CHILL OUT

  9. Haha I love this! I remember I read this series years ago and actually loved it, but I really don’t think I’d enjoy it as much now. I definitely agree that the books get worse as the series goes on (seriously, the last one was shambles from what I remember) and it’s so odd that they all call her Belly! I also may have laughed when I read your example of Belly’s narration, haha – mainly because it’s so accurate! I’m so sorry you didn’t enjoy this series, here’s to reading much better books this summer!

  10. Ahhha I love how much you hate this book, rage reviews are always so fun to readπŸ™ˆ I have never read this book, but I did attempt to watch the show (people say the show is miles better than the book but idk it wasn’t my cup of tea, all that love triangle DRAMA)
    Great post!!

    1. Also I can’t get over the fact that the main character’s name is belly, I my mind just keeps telling me StOmaCh

  11. I read the title for this post and was already entertained. I read this trilogy years ago now…maybe in 2014 or something. It was after I’d read the first two books in her To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before so probs sometime like that. 13 year old me didn’t mind it too much, the vibes were ok-ish? Honestly though I would probably hurl the books at my wall if I attempted reading them now cause I do remember having problems with certain things. Mostly Belly being annoying, the love triangle wasn’t the love triangle I wanted, it was meh and full of drama.

    A part of me is intrigued and perhaps willing to try to reread the series if I can somehow watch the adaptation. Then again another part of me is like, do I want to suffer through the trilogy? Anyway, I ADORED this rant so much Anoushka! Fav ice cream flavour would be mint choc chip or bubblegum flavour. I used to like swimming as a kid, mostly it was me going underwater and not actually swimming but I’ve not swam in years now. I do miss being by the beach and near some water, a lake or the ocean. Fav book…well the most recent one I read was Chasing Lucky by Jenn Bennett which I loved so, so much! It was just what I needed, slow burn, complex relationships and just set in this small village.

  12. OMG! Okay on one side, it always sucks when we don’t enjoy something people always talk about. On the other side, it does make for fun rant posts! I love this post! And your Belly narration was HILARIOUS!
    I read these books such a long time ago, and to be honest I don’t remember much. Just a few major plot points. I remember liking them when I read them, but honestly, if I read them now I don’t think I’d even be able to finish the first book.
    I heard good things about the show though, but I have yet to watch it myself.

  13. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ I LOVED THIS REVIEW, ANOUSHKA!! Oh my god, I think my favorite part is where you describe Belly as a narrator and summarize the story because you are just so on point!! I read this series years ago (when I was still smol and in high school 😁) and it was the reason I put off reading To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before for years, despite people telling me it was good. I just couldn’t picture Jenny Han writing anything I would enjoy after The Summer I Turned pretty mess πŸ˜… (Although I was proved wrong on that front later.) I mean, I didn’t passionately hate it, but the series was so bland and boring and love-triangly that I just did not get the hype! And yes, omg, what sort of nickname is Belly?? πŸ™ˆπŸ€£

    Also, swimming is the best sport ever, and my favorite ice cream flavor is hazelnut because it is the most superior ice cream flavor the world has ever seen πŸ˜‡

  14. I SO AGREEEE
    THE AMOUNT OF TIMES I WANTED TO KNOCK SOME SENSE INTO BELLY’S HEAD WAS UNCOUNTABLE

    And ALSO ISN’T THE LOBE TRIANGLE WITH BROTHERS WEIRD?? I MEAN BELLY WUD SOMEDAY HAVE A CHILD AND BE LIKE HEY, I KISSED YOUR UNCLE, just blegh~~

  15. Obsessed with this post and so glad your back!!!
    ALSO IM SO GLAD I WASNT THE ONLY ONE WHO DIDN LIKE THAT BOOK AT ALL!!! I APPLAUD YOU FOR EVEN BEING ABLE TO GET THROUGH THE WHOLE SEROES BECAUSE I COULD ONLY GET THROUGH THE FIRST!!

  16. ANOUSHKA!!! HELLO HIIII HOW ARE YOU???? GOOD TO SEE YOU BACK AGAIN <3 <3 <3

    And oh my god THANK YOU FOR PUTTING YOURSELF THROUGH SO MUCH TORTURE AND GIFTING US THIS WONDERFUL RANTY REVIEW IT IS SIMPLY CHEF’S KISS.

    AND HOW DARE THIS BOOK RUIN THE IDEA OF SUMMER??? LIKE YOU SAID ICE CREAM???? HOW CAN A SYNOPSIS BE SO MISLEADING

    (ALSO BELLY LMAO WHAT KIND OF A NAME IS THAT I’M CRYING)

    THERE’S NO ICECREAM?????? MY LIFE HAS BEEN A LIE THIS IS TERRIBLE
    UGH BELLY SEEMS SO STUPID CAN WE TAKE HER DOWN TOGETHER PLEASE??? LOVE QUADRILATERAL OH MY GOD HOW COULD THIS GET ANY WORSE

    AND AKSKSJ CONGRATULATIONS ON FINISHING THAT MONSTROUS SERIES!!! I’M NEVER PICKING THIS UP AHAHA

    LOVED YOUR REVIEW SO MUCH,,, AND GLAD TO SEE YOU BACK AGAIN~!!!!!<3

  17. okay so i read book 1 way back after finishing to all the boys ive loved before series because i thought this would be good too as BOY was i wrong. i DNFed the first book? or finished the first book? and didn’t continue with the series. i hate love triangles so that was my main hate reason and the writing wasn’t good and as you said in several different ways, belly was ANNOYING. reading your review was entertaining but you should have given up on it way earlier instead of continuing lol. more time for TJR books and such.

  18. THIS WAS THE BEST REVIEW, EVER!!! hahaha! I am dying laughing at you murdering belly. I get it. I kinda low-key hated her in the show but I did like the show. I have seen several people say they disliked the books though. I took them off my TBR and will not be reading them!! I despise love triangles and had an issue with that in the show. Seems like I would hate it even more in the books! Thank you so much, for making me laugh today! <3 <3

  19. We love wonderfully rant filled reviews!!! Annoying main characters are the worst, and this will be immediately removed from the to be read. I loved this review so much, it was hilarious and wonderful. And yes ice cream!! Very important!! Truly evil of the book to mislead you like that. Good job getting through the series!

  20. “belly is the queen of dumbness and MAKING-THE-OBVIOUS-WRONG-DECISIONS-BECAUSE-SHE-EITHER-THINKS-ITS-FUN-TO-MESS-LIFE-UP-OR-AFOREMENTIONED-TERRIBLE-CHOICES-ARE-MAYBE-BASED-OFF-OF-SHEER-DUMBNESS-THAT-MAKES-UP-HER-ENTIRE-LIFE.”

    That’s it. I meant to read this 2 days from now but thanks to you, it’s been kicked out of my tbrπŸ˜‚ I’m also grateful – it was growing unhealthily long. Anyhow, so glad you’re back and so sad you had to endure all that pain. Thanks for the heads-up, haha!

  21. I’ve done it. I have read an entire series of books that I disliked because I HAD TO FINISH IT ALL! In case it got better? maybe. I hope your next book/books are much better!

  22. ANOUSHKA, this has got to be the funniest post I’ve read by you πŸ˜‚. I was having dinner when I read this and I had to stop eating because omg lmao— i can’t believe i missed this post somehow, this is pure gold!

    why would you be of the opinion that disappearing in fun?! πŸ’€
    Also summer supremacy! I love everything about summer 😭😭. Except the sweat perhaps but that’s fine too, as long as it’s not winter I’m fine.
    Also did you seriously just call us small dumb olives πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚?!!
    I loveeeeed the part where you described belly as a narrator, that was hilarious! Hahaha
    You roasted this trilogy so bag omg you deserve a legit award! I mean, I have fond memories of book series i don’t even know why, but i agree i was really annoyed at so many parts!
    Not to mention, belly has to be the worst name ever πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚. Right next to America singer.
    You calling it a love quadratical was lit.
    NGL i liked the cancer aspect of it? But when i read the series i hadn’t read too many books that dealt with body diseases so i can’t be sure if it was because the author wrote it well or the lack of experience lol.
    Also can we just talk about that belly and Jeremiah getting engaged at the age of 18 is like ew?!??
    The way you’re writing all this is downright hilarious πŸ˜‚πŸ€£.
    I loved how you just asked questions to the readers and ended up answering them yourself. Like you asked- am i right? And answered- i am right, what even πŸ˜†.
    And you really do love ice creams, don’t u 🍧
    πŸ˜‚ I love swimming btw.
    Also remind me to never to come near you when you’re reading a novel worthy of a rant review πŸ’€

  23. I haven’t read non fiction in such a long time!! I remember being in love with young adult books when I was a bit younger, but now, I’m more into that *ahem* self development section, and I keep buying more and more books there. I love your style of writing, you sound so fun!!

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